Breaking: William Kristol explodes from hypocrisy

WASHINGTON — The rear section of Time Magazine star columnist William Kristol exploded today, leaving the neo-conservative leader hospitalized and in stable condition. Attending physicians have said they believe Kristol is the first human to ever literally explode from intellectual dishonesty.

“We all knew that hypocrisy builds up,” said Dr. Sven Hanson of Toronto, where Kristol is being treated. “We actually refer to this as the “Trickle-Down Theory” of intellectual dishonesty. This is, however, the first confirmed case of some one actually exploding from it.”

Department of Homeland Security keeps busy terrifying your children

The Department of Homeland Security – helping terrorize Citizens of The Homeland for more than five years.

Fox News: “$600 Billion for the War on Terror: A bargain at twice the price?”

This was the Fox News argument today with Steve Forbes: “$600 Billion for the War on Terror: A bargain at twice the price?”

The pros: The U.S. hasn’t been attacked since 9/11 and the Dow Jones is high.

Yet somehow, Daily Kos is a bunch of out-of-control ideologues and are essentially the KKK and Nazis, according to the same station.

There is little doubt in my mind that this era in history will be recorded in crayon, if not blood.

–WKW

Pentagon to Clinton: Shut up and stop asking questions about Iraq, traitor

Hillary Clinton, Senator, Presidential Candidate, Senate Armed Services Committee member, and, according to the Pentagon, someone who needs to shut up and stop asking so many questions.

Pentagon challenges Clinton’s Iraq talk

Question of the Day

While watching a mindless few minutes of some “Holy Fuck Look At That Video!” show, it came to a part where an Uruguayan speedboater smashed into the officials’ boat at full speed, wrecking both and causing both to sink, but not really hurting anyone (Or so they say. They never actually admit to anyone dying on that show. They had a clip once of a bull rider getting drug around for about 14 hours by an incensed bull, until the rider was much more splotch than man, and the narrator said “And yet,he only suffered a few contusions and a broken ankle” or some such nonsense).

Dolphin gets into the pink

Good morning. Care for some pink dolphin?

And yep, it’s real. And you can see more of it by clicking here.

–WKW

Update: Michael Vick fucked

Updating my post from a little while back “Fuck you, Michael Vick,” a federal grand jury has done just that to the dog-torturer:

Falcons’ Vick indicted by grand jury in dogfighting probe

Vatican: “It’s not like we’re the only ones molesting children”

The Catholic Church. No, they didn’t create child molestation, they just made it an art form.

Sexual abuse not just a Catholic problem: Vatican

Shakesville exclusive! Mike Gravel spends $5 on valet parking

When you think of the term “Transportation Costs” for Presidential candidates eager to spread their views, you generally think of costs for private jets among other things. Needless to say, for many of the candidates in the all-important 2008 race for the Presidency, transportation costs are sky high and often a cause for concern.

Of course, apparently not for Alaskan Senator Mike Gravel. A recent analysis of Gravel’s expense reports shows an interesting fact – in June, Gravel sent a check for $5 (US) to Leland Parking Services in Anchorage.

Apparently, the “rugged” Democrat from Alaska doesn’t like parking his own car.

Reid tells GOP: Bring on the Nuclear Option and filibuster away

[NOTE FROM MELISSA: I’m leaving this post at the top for awhile, since it’s the big story of the day, and I want to make sure everyone has a chance to see it.]

Sometimes they listen. Now let’s see the Republicans use the “Nuclear Option” so that they can outright refuse to even vote on Reed/Levin Iraq legislation.

From Think Progress:

Moments ago, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) announced that in response to conservative obstructionism, he plans to force war supporters to physically remain in the Senate and filibuster Iraq withdrawal legislation.

Reid accused conservatives of “protecting the President rather than protecting our troops” by “denying us an up or down vote on the most important issue our country faces.” He said that if a vote on the Reed/Levin Iraq legislation is not allowed today or tomorrow, he will keep the Senate in session “straight through the night on Tuesday” and force a filibuster. From Reid’s speech:

Republicans are using a filibuster to block us from even voting on an amendment that could bring the war to a responsible end. They are protecting the President rather than protecting our troops.

They are denying us an up or down — yes or no — vote on the most important issue our country faces.

I would like to inform the Republican leadership and all my colleagues that we have no intention of backing down.

If Republicans do not allow a vote on Levin/Reed today or tomorrow, we will work straight through the night on Tuesday.

The American people deserve an open and honest debate on this war, and they deserve an up or down vote on this amendment to end it.

Scientology murders two in Australia

When a manic Tom Cruise told Matt Lauer “You don’t know the history of psychiatry. I do,” on the Today Show, it was easy to ridicule and ignore the Mission Impossible star. Years of being hemmed in by his own mammoth fame, and his deep involvement with Scientology had given him his own sense of reality.

Looking back, however, the obvious conclusion is that Cruise is but another overprotected simpleton sucked into a corrupt cult. A corrupt cult that has no qualms about sending people off on murderous rages.

Accused family killer was ‘denied treatment by Scientologist parents’

George W. Bush and the Rejectionists’ Greatest Hits

“Large offers and sturdy rejections are among the most common topics of falsehood”

—Samuel Johnson

Breaking News: War profiteering leads to dead U.S. troops

One would think that a Republican President and Republican-dominated Congress would have understood the concept that competition is healthy. You know, being we’re a capitalist nation at all.

Of course, it’s not like Bush and crew are real Republicans. Or even real Americans. Because for Bush and friends, the safety of the nation and of U.S. Troops are nowhere near as important as making sure your friends and political donors get big government contracts.

From Bob Geiger:

Defense Department’s No-Bid Contracts Put “Troops In Iraq At Risk”

Corrupt DOJ says criminal White House can ignore impotent Congress

Much as we learned how it pays to stack the Supreme Court with like-minded ideologues, it pays to fill the Department of Justice with those who are loyal Bushies.

Can we call it a Constitutional crisis yet? Or have we moved past that?

Justice Dept. to White House officials: Ignore Congress

Find the Authoritarian!

Hi everyone and welcome to “Find the Authoritarian”, the blog post where we take a look at four separate entities then choose which one is the Authoritarian of the bunch.

As you all know, Authoritarians, like Scientologists, are a growing menace in the United States. And while studies show that just one in four in the U.S. would eagerly bow down to a dictator, this fringe group has proven over and over again to be incredibly destructive and demoralizing to the nation.

Who are we?

Late in his film “Sicko”, filmmaker Michael Moore asks a question about himself and his fellow Americans:

“Who are we?”

It is a question with many answers, and more and more, those answers are frightening. We are a nation that spends $12 billion monthly on a war that the vast majority consider a worthless, stupid exercise, yet one man can stubbornly keep the money, and blood flowing. And while spending that money to help create a fractured Iraq, members of the media can somehow connect healing people with terrorism, because it advances their ideology of killing rather than healing.

Who are we?

We’ll be back, right after this Big Ad

The posting will be right back, following this Big Ad:

We now return to the regularly scheduled blogging, already in progress.

–WKW

Dear America: You totally need to get laid

If there was ever a nation that truly needed to get laid, it’s the United States. You, know, even just a little nooner to knock out the cobwebs, clean the pipes, whatever. Because, honestly, this shit is getting out of hand. To paraphrase the Joker, this nation needs an enema.

Residents of Oregon town say shape of traffic posts is offensive

Remember when John McCain was a legitimate Presidential candidate?

Remember those heady days when John McCain was considered a legitimate Presidential candidate? Hell, the guy was but a few swiftboatings by Karl Rove away from being the GOP candidate in 2000. It all seems so long ago.

Because now, the wheels are officially off:

McCain campaign suffers key shakeups

National Review obsession with Al Gore and Global Warming

The National Review, home of such substantial bloggers as Super-Serious War-Mongering Fuck No. 1, and Super-Serious War-Mongering Fuck No. 2, have shown they have a thing about Al Gore and Global Warming, and will write anything to try and discredit either of them.

Since June 19, NRO has published about 50 posts, containing 15,000 words, all on Al Gore, Al Gore using energy, how Live Earth used energy, etc. Plus, it has every last possible purposeful misrepresentation of any global warming news you can find. It is a lie-filled, pseudoscience wonderland of Al Gore and environmentalist bashing.