Attack of the Phallic Thingies: The Big Wet One

Ladies and gentlemen, I present The Hydropolis Underwater Hotel in Dubai, United Arab Emirates:

Currently under construction in Dubai, Hydropolis is the world’s first luxury underwater hotel. It will include three elements: the land station, where guests will be welcomed, the connecting tunnel, which will transport people by train to the main area of the hotel, and the 220 suites within the submarine leisure complex. It is one of the largest contemporary construction projects in the world, covering an area of 260 hectares, about the size of London’s Hyde Park.

“Hydropolis is not a project; it’s a passion,” enthuses Joachim Hauser, the developer and designer of the hotel.

The estimated cost of the hotel is £300 million, and it’s set to open in December 2007. Come one, come all!



Filed under 03_litbrit

28 responses to “Attack of the Phallic Thingies: The Big Wet One

  1. Litbrit – You win the prize with this one…. OMG!

  2. Brings a whole new meaning to the term “water sports.”

  3. NameChanged

    Apparently, it is a passion. The passion of the cock.

  4. i love, love, love, the bubble action right at the appropriate place up top. i gotta go. i bet they have a caberet room where we could play.

  5. Arkades

    Wow, the possibility of drowning without even leaving your hotel!

  6. Jay in Oregon

    I predict a summer blockbuster in 2008 set in this hotel.

    The possibilities are endless.

  7. Chromosome Crawl


  8. Oh, I think it can’t be a surprising in a world where the phallus has achieved the status of a deity, though there is no man in the world capable of such a sustained erection.

    It is opposite of the fear of the vagina dentata, the fantasy of the everlasting erection.

  9. *snicker* *snicker* *snicker* heeheeheeHAHAHA

    Jesus, I haven’t had so much fun snickering since I was about twelve and first heard about something or other that was big news to me at the time.

  10. Perhaps, when Mclame’s campaign comes completely unstuck, he’ll invite the few people still on board and not in jail to the opening. From todays news I understand they love “Water Sports”.

  11. Em


    It’s Sealab.


  12. RBL

    Wow. And it’s even uncircumcised. That’s… something, alright.

  13. I think I dated this hotel. It looks strangely familiar.

  14. I’m desperately trying to think of something involving “wet spots” here, but nothing somes to mind.

    I guess my brain is just too flaccid to rise to the occasion with all this competition.

  15. Benjamin

    Regarding the phallic resemblance, well…. too easy (sea-men, wet spots, etc).

    What I want to know is why billions of dollars are being spent on constructing the obvious site of future horror films.

    Come on…

    “We’re very excited with the progress on our construction of the latest representation of mans hubris. The posh furnishings will appeal to a wide range of the arrogant wealthy (who would provide great social catharsis, should they die for unforseeable reasons), and our friendly staff of down-to-earth underdogs with an unlikely range of survival skills will be happy to see to your needs. Our first round of guests have already made reservations for the exciting “Reckless Science” convention. Dr. Nyarlethotep will be hosting a public discussion titled “Archaeology: New techniques for unleashing Ancient Evil”, followed by a lecture on the recently mapped “Brain-eating killing machine” human genome, with the promise of an on-floor demonstration. Computer buffs will be excited to know that the whole event will be under the administration of our advanced AI, the DIpolar EFfectual LEns SHaped Binary Alpha Gamma System, affectionately dubbed “DI.EF.LE.SH.B.A.G.S”. In other exciting news, our Marine Predator Eugenics and Combat Training Lab is almost fully operational, pending some minor problems with animal containment.

    We are absolutely certain that nothing could possibly go wrong, though radar above the Hotel does indicate an incoming storm which may interrupt all communica…..”

  16. Gee, looks like it was modeled on one of my toys. I wonder if the architects shop at the same store or if they’ve been raiding my toy drawer.

  17. tom

    Of course all this discussion on “phallic” buildings overlooks
    where the real power is: the capital. A giant tit.

  18. Jeff

    I think that the Islamists finally have a credible cause they can all rally around.

    They could call it ‘Death to the Giant Cock’

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  20. Jonathan

    It looks like a Nike.

  21. db

    What a copout. They’re building it . . . UNDERWATER?

    Of course, not only would it not be possible to build such a thing above water in Dubai or the Middle East in general, I don’t think it would be possible anywhere else. Above ground phallic efforts still have to be marginally more abstract (e.g Swiss Re London, Chicago Spire). The underwater thing has given architects the freedom to do what they really think, and the client has bitten on it. We trust not literally. Funny.

  22. Somewhere, Irwin Allen is smiling….

  23. queenshixe

    nice underwater hotel it looks like a man hotdog.:):)hehehe

  24. Jewish Gal

    I refuse to stay at an uncircumcised hotel! But they probably would not let me into their country anyway.

  25. Pingback: Top 8 Buildings That Look Like Male Genitals « Hrag Vartanian

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