Question of the Day

This one’s pretty simple; sparked by a phone call I got over the weekend.

Are you still in touch with your best friend from childhood?

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46 Comments

Filed under 06_bobby

46 responses to “Question of the Day

  1. Oh, thanks a lot. No, I’m not, not with either set. I had one guy who was my best friend from babyhood all the way to junior high, when he and I just drifted apart. That wasn’t so bad, both of us were cool with it.

    But there were 2 guys in high school that I got pretty tight with, and I’ve lost contact with both of them. Thing is, I know how to get hold of each of them through Myspace, but I won’t.

    I’m a terrible person.

  2. hk

    As a Navy brat keeping in touch hasn’t worked out so well. However, I just found one from a couple moves ago on myspace and emailed her, no response yet.

  3. Kate Harding

    No one pre-high school, but I’m still in touch with several friends who’ve been in my life since I was 13 or 14. People are often shocked to learn I’m still close to a bunch of high school friends, since I despised everything about high school — I’m not exactly one to relive the glory days. But I lucked out and met some awesome people back then, who made it all bearable… and continue to make lots of yucky things bearable.

  4. My best friend from childhood grew up to be a Rebel flag waving, wife beating, redneck bigot. So the answer is an emphatic no!

  5. Betsy

    Yes! With my best friend from the time I was 3 days old (I talked to her on the phone yesterday); with the first friend I made when I was moved across the country at age 7 (talked to her a couple of weeks ago); with my first real boyfriend in high school, whom I dated for 5 years (we email sporadically), and with all my college roommates (there were 8 of us senior year), including my freshman roommate and the wonderful French girl I lived with when I did study abroad in Ireland. I seem to be sticky that way.

  6. Doktor Wankenstein

    From childhood — not really.

    But I had a good friend from college (mid-seventies), he was practically my bro, and we gradually drifted apart over the last twenty years. I still sent holiday cards, and sometimes included my email address. He finally emailed me back this spring, and then I LOST HIS GODDAM EMAIL ADDRESS! AUGH!

  7. I haven’t kept up with anyone I either went to high school or college the first time around. I do keep in touch with a couple very good friends from Library School.
    But my very best friend is my oldest friend in the world. She’s like my big sister and has been pretty much since birth. And I always keep in touch with her.

  8. Yes and no. I mean, we are still in touch but we’re not close and there’s a lot of animosity and hurt feelings there. It’s very sad. But we’re in different places in our lives and that’s okay. I guess. Sigh.

  9. oddjob

    No, but that person is not someone I would want to stay in touch with. He was a great teacher of what to expect from an emotionally toxic person. I’m still in touch with friends I made twenty years ago, but close friends from earlier in my life I’ve lost contact with. My best friends from high school I’ve tried to recontact, with mixed results.

  10. Misty

    We catch up on occasion, the other two of my/our old trio from way back when. Our lives went in very different directions and then I added a lot of distance to what was already faltering relationships.

    Now my other dear friend, I stay in touch with him. I wouldn’t have ever called him my “best friend” back then, but sometimes we can be quite blind to what’s right in front of us when we’re 17, eh? He’s been a true friend over the past 14 years now and is someone I always hope to have in my life until the end.

  11. skywind

    My best friend from high school died ten years ago at the age of 37 from aggressive breast cancer. Her mom died of the same thing when we were kids. I fear for her daughter, who is now in her early twenties.

    I’ve never had a lot of friends, so her death was really hard on me.

  12. Betsy

    Oh, Skywind, I’m so sorry. That’s awful. Hugs to you.

  13. mamajane

    I’m still in touch with my best friend from fifth grade on. The contact has been at times sporadic, mostly thanks to her toxic former husband, but now we talk and email pretty regularly. We’re planning a vacation together in September. We were part of the same circle of friends in high school, and all but two of the group reconnected at our twenty year reunion last summer. The whole group talks regularly, usually via a once a week email free-for-all, that can easily eat up half a day. Luckily everyone has desk jobs except me, and since I’m a full-time student, my time is pretty liquid. One of these friends is my ex-boyfriend, and we are now much closer than we ever were when we dated. Luckily, hubby-poo adores him too.

  14. Paul the Spud

    Childhood, no, but those of us that formed a close-knit group in highschool are still pretty close. One of my good friends I still see on a regular (weekly or biweekly) basis.

  15. Yes. Well, it depends on how you define childhood. Less than 14, no. One is dead and one is a cowboy.

  16. Brynn

    Sadly, no. He never responded to my coming out letter. Considering I’ve heard he’s a born-again Christian living in eastern Washington State, it’s probably for the best. Ironically, his older brother–who was best friends with my older brother–just transitioned about 5 years ago. Must have been something in the water in El Cajon!!

  17. Sadly, no. One of the hazards of leaving a closed society like a fundamentalist church is that you usually lose all contact with both friends and family. It’s this bad–today is my parents’ 41st wedding anniversary, but they don’t talk to me anymore, so I can’t even celebrate with them. It’s a bit depressing at times.

  18. Yes. I was lucky enough to have been born with my best friend. My twin and I still talk on the phone several times a week and get together as much as we can.

  19. SAP

    Sure, I am. He and his wife are coming to visit in a few weeks. Of course, him being my brother helps. 😉

  20. No. I suck at staying in touch with people.

  21. Two people are part of my answer. I was friendly with one guy since 1969, when I was five. We kind of parted ways in the college years. The other guy, I also knew since 1969 and we got tighter as we got older. I am still best friends with him.

  22. Jersey

    My best freinds from pre-coming out, no. They both bolted pretty quickly, just couldn’t come to grips with my having boyfriends. Now my post-coming out friends, several have died over the years (at 41 we went through the worst of it) but my bestest, yes we still talk every so often. Love ya Eddy Earl!

  23. NameChanged

    My friend from childhood has moved to Japan, but we contact each other regularly, and when she comes home for a visit I always get to spend a couple of days with her. She is one of the best friends I have ever had and I am blessed to know her.

    My friend from high school went through a period of hard drug use, a rocky marriage, and a divorce. We kept in touch sporadically, but it was pretty one sided. Her daughter was recently murdered by the babysitter, and I am trying to be here to support her, but she is pretty closed off from any contact. I keep up my end so that she knows that she is not alone.

    Now it is time to send some emails and make some calls.

  24. Jewel

    Yes, seeing as she’s my sister. 😀

    My other best friend from childhood was a cousin who lived down the street. She was my bestest friend at the age when sis and I had the sibling rivalry going on. I’m still in touch with the cuz, be it sporadically. I talk to the sis regularly and we’re still good friends.

  25. Best friend since around age 12, happily yes: Best man at my wedding in 2003 (I was second-best-man at his in 1991, bumped for his roommate), and we are the godfathers to each others’ eldest children.

    Plus, we are all adolescent nerds enough in our late 30s that we still play tabletop RPGs, and he joins the group via webcam each week from two states away.

  26. What maurinsky said. I’m terrible at it. Not proud of it, sort of ashamed of it, but mostly it’s just there. I’m really, really, really not good. I’m barely able to keep in touch with my brother. Cousins are a vain hope.

  27. I changed schools too many times during childhood to form any sort of lasting bond (even now at 42 I find myself still a bit on the feral side).

    But I keep in touch with my best friend (we’ve been close friends for nearly 20 years now) nearly every day.

  28. I was gay in small-town Iowa, so it was more a matter of my friends not keeping in touch with me.

    I’ve tried to contact a few of them ten years out, and they were receptive, but I found it was way too much work to make my life “acceptably” gay for them. Who needs it?

  29. I’m still in touch with two of my friends from the old neighborhood in Pine Bluff, Arkansas, but other than that…

  30. Constant Comment

    I, like Vicster, changed schools a lot when I was a kid. I am still in touch with one guy from junior high. I reconnected with him after 35 years (and that was 10 years ago!) but that was mainly because his name crops up in the news every now and then, so I emailed him to see if it was the same person. (It is.) We share the same birthday, so that’s usually the only time we touch base. I am still in touch with my best friend from high school and the five friends I met the first day of my first year in college. So, I guess you could say the answer is yeah, pretty much! I think my desire to keep up communications is due to all the moving around. Friends never felt permanent when I was younger, but now that I’ve lived in the Chicago area the last 40 years (yikes), I have no excuse…

  31. The guys who were my best friends in elementary school, no. I have no idea what happened to them.

    But I am still close friends with a guy I met during the first week of junior high. He’s on my blogroll, and I’m on his. He lives in a different state now but we see each other about twice a year.

  32. I wanna rock your Gypsy soul.

    I like quoting silly lyrics. It makes me feel so fuckin superior…when that fog horn blows.

  33. Yes, she read the eulogy at my father’s memorial service in January (it was written by my 14-year-old daughter for an essay contest when she was 10, but she didn’t feel up to reading it at the time). We can go without seeing each other or even talking for months at a time, but when we do connect, it’s like we’ve never been apart. We had three other girls in our crew, and it’s pretty much the same when I see them.

  34. Ignore art. It flings at you all the time until you get tired of swatting at it.

    Just fucking kill it.

  35. Sooner or later, it’s between you and someone else. And the best you can hope for is a musician with a rusted trumpet.

    And when you get one with a busted mouth harp then you totally freak out. Coz you know those guys can piece that shit together and make you feel all black and shit.

  36. DBK

    Depends on what you mean by “childhood”. If 14 and the first day of high school, then yes, amd it is thirty-five years later and we’re still best friends.

  37. Moved around nearly yearly until I was in 6th grade. Never had anything close to a “best friend” until I was a junior in high school — lost track of her after I got married. Still know where a couple of my high school gang are, dittos my college gang.

    But I married my best friend, even if I didn’t meet him until college.

  38. Kym

    Oh gods, no. I’m not even in touch with my high school friends anymore. I really don’t think they want to talk to me.

  39. Oh, NO. I am definitely not. Damn it.

    (Remembers the good times.)

  40. No. All my budies from high school got killed right at the beginning of the Koran war. And later, my best buddy from flying school, Mexico days went to Nam to fly choppers and bought it there. After that, not a lot of friends. Till I met SWMBO and she is not only my wife but the best friend I’ve ever had. Even if she nags the shit out of me at times. (Some evil people might say I deserve it but what do they know.)

  41. Oh, Grumpy Old Man — you know you deserve it! 😉

    My “oldest” friend in contact was going on 30 years — we’ve talked/written/emailed at least once month since 1978 — then my best friend from grade school contacted me via an internet search — and we’ve been emailing ever since, after, what? — nearly 40 years separation when I moved out of town.

  42. Oh, Grumpy Old Man — you know you deserve it!

    You Wimmin always stick together don’t you. LOL

    Bye the bye, where is it you live actually ’cause I’m from up in that neck of the woods too. Ever heard of Custer? Where mother nature inserted the tube when she gave the world an enema.

  43. amish451

    I live within walking distance of a friend from elementary school, we are much better friends now than then. The third of the pals is out of state, out of touch with me, and my brand of politics; but I keep track of him through my buddy down the road. Relationships seem dictated as much by geography as anything. I still keep in touch sporadically with High School friends but that bunch scattered around the planet. Most of those people eclipsed my ambitions by galaxies….but when we get together we are always friends. Best friend, I find that a difficult concept to get my head around; friendships evolve and move and adapt ….I truthfully cannot define who my best friend from childhood might have been…….childhood was a lifetime in my past; I have had multiple lives since.

  44. Sadly, No. She might still live in Lowell; I know her Mom still lives in the same house. I don’t know why I don’t look her up on myspace or something. She might be happy to hear from me….

  45. I keep in touch with my best friends from my freshman year of high school. But my best friend from *childhood*–that is, the girl who was my very bestest friend in the world from ages 3-7–no, I don’t. I know her full name, but no idea how I would find her.

  46. carol

    My first friend that I met, when I was 3; I married him. We have 4 kids. We didn’t start dating until we were 19; which I think is a good thing, but he is still my best friend. The most in synch with the fun things I want to do (camping, traveling, making sock puppets with the kids, etc.)

    My other childhood friends, no, not really, but I did meet a group of girls in my freshman year of high school that I am still hopelessly devoted to and they are like sisters to me. We’ve been through it all together; homelessness, divorce, death- we live all over the country now, but we try to see each other a few times a year.

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