It’s Because We’re Arty, With Male Full Frontal

The explanation informs me the rating was determined based on the presence of the following words: torture (5x) sex (4x) abortion (3x) gays (2x) meth (1x). Which is pretty amusing, when you consider in what context each of those words is used around here. Via George.



Filed under 01_shakespeares_sister

54 responses to “It’s Because We’re Arty, With Male Full Frontal

  1. Absolutely. There’s not nearly enough male full frontal, in fact. More beefcake! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Bloggers and members of the Commentariat, I’m so proud of y’all!

  2. yes, more, more! ; )

  3. My little pad is rated R, which seems about right. But look at the words that got me there:

    * death (5x)
    * dead (4x)
    * dangerous (3x)
    * crack (2x)
    * murder (1x)

    I must stop writing all those crime stories and gangster tales!

  4. Allie

    They dinged you for “gay” but not for, oh I don’t know, QCoFM?

  5. I made the R with
    hell (6x)
    shit (4x)
    dead (3x)
    fuck (2x)
    piss (1x)

    Dead is a bad word for kiddies? Not if you are from Iraq or Afghanistan apparently.

  6. Ivory Bill Woodpecker


    NOW what’s the blog rated? ๐Ÿ˜›

  7. – Rated G

    My post “Meth Abortion Gay Sex Torture and the Bush Administration” should change that, however.


  8. I was a pg with Hell (3x) and ass (1x) but tried a little experiment.

    I added “gay”, “abortion” and “fuckhead” and was… dingdingding! Given an R rating! However, my rating said it was because there were 3 hells, 2 shits and 1 asshole.

    Really? I didn’t add any of those.

    But I’m an R!!! yeah! a little street cred.

  9. X! I got a Motherfucking X!

    motherfucker (x4) then shits, craps, torture, and the other usual suspects.


  10. oh yeah, i wuz so insensed i forgot that i came here to blogwhore. . .

    an observation on Senator Clinton and a question about Angelina Jolie

  11. Dittos on the “G” rating. Seems I’ve got nuthin’ but a couple of “pain”s and a “death”. I coulda swore I had a few swear-words in there… It must not search back very far.

    Oh, and it obviously doesn’t recurse on the linky-love. ‘Cause baby, IHasATARDIS is definitely NC-17. (Tsk, geeksex macros. For shame.)

  12. Ratings for some of my web presence:

    LiveJournal: NC-17
    sex (4x) kill (3x) murder (2x) fuck (1x)

    My fiction blog.: G
    pain (1x)

    The rating bot doesn’t look deeper into the site, obviously, since there’s smut in it.

    The Book of Ruth:” NC-17
    cunt (5x) clit (3x) fucking (2x) dangerous (1x)

    Dangerous? Dangerous is a problem word?

  13. It’s kind of funny that they picked up those words and not the “forbidden” ones.

    My blog is rated G, but the scanner picked up the word “dyke,” as in “Dyke Marsh,” the name of a local park.

  14. Minstrel Boy, you fuckin’ pottymouth, you. An X???

    (I am now terribly curious as to whether a triple-X rating is available, and what, exactly, it would take to earn it. On the BLOG, I mean. Probably lots of words like Bush Plan, Dirty Gonzalez, Drilling Rights, One Last Surge…)

  15. Well, with Spudsy bumping cunt all the time on the front page, no wonder it’s got an NC-17 rating.

    All I got was an “R” rating. It’s dinging me for drug references, but the only ones I talk about are for asthma and depression. So I’m not sure I even deserve the R rating. I need to try harder.

  16. i was rated G even tho i used the word “dead”

    it’s clear they don’t read content, especially some of my poems!!!

    ha, fooled em! ; )

  17. Kate Harding

    I got an R for:
    * suck (4x)
    * shit (2x)
    * cunt (1x)
    Apparently, I don’t say “gay” enough to deserve an NC-17.

  18. NC-17

    * shit (5x)
    * hell (4x)
    * poop (3x)
    * death (2x)
    * dangerous (1x)

    poop? dangerous?

  19. whoo hoo! the blog i just started on as a contributor yesterday, gets an R for this:

    lesbian (3x) gay (2x) ass (1x

    i’m so proud! see what a straight middle aged gramma can do when she finds herself some bright and talented lesbians and others to blog with! : )

  20. Allie

    Can I just throw out that it pisses me off that the words “gay” and “lesbian” are considered grounds for changing your rating? The very act of mentioning LGBT people might be so shocking to little ears that we need to protect them?

    Damn, that’s some homophobia.

  21. Jeff

    Gee…they counted words like METH and GAY against you? Interesting….I guess you would have blown the knickers off of the churchlady if they actually understood what QCoFM was!

  22. Whoo hoo! NC-17 baby!
    death – 3
    bitches – 2
    ass – 1

  23. Jeff

    I love it….Little Green Footballs got an NC-17 too…theirs was for the following:

    suicide (17x)
    bomb (10x)
    kill (6x)
    death (4x)
    murder (3x)
    dangerous (2x)
    hurt (1x)

    I’ll take your perversions over theirs anyday, Melissa.

  24. JoAsakura

    1) I am deeply disturbed that there is no full frontal male nudity in this post. False advertising I say!

    2)I got a G rating. WHAT THE POOP? Man. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

  25. They counted the word “crap” against me. Of course, they also noted “cock” used twice, but it was in the context of a Cock Flavored Soup packet, so go figure.

  26. Bah. I call merde de taureau on this quiz. The word counts that landed me a PG-13 rating match neither the instances of usage on the home page nor usage on the entire blog…which makes it all seem rather arbitrary.

    A blog search indicates that I’ve used these suspect words at least once per this many posts:

    porn X 8

    death X 174

    dead X 180

    The holy trinity of shit, piss, and fuck has been employed at least this many times:

    shit X 21

    piss X 11

    fuck X 44

    Evidently, I’m not using those words enough to count. Save for gay and lesbian:

    gay X 73

    lesbian X 28

    The low number of instances of lesbian does surprise me. I shall have to work on that.

  27. Jeff

    This is too much fun! Hannity & Colmes website rated a PG13 for the following terms:

    sex (7x)
    dick (2x)
    death (1x)

    Dick times two….how appripeau.

  28. yeah it is telling that anything that mentions gay or anything close to it gets a big old siren screaming and everything screeches to a halt, isn’t it?

  29. NC-17 baby!!! Yah!!

    hit (5x)
    lesbian (4x)
    fuck (3x)
    abortion (2x)
    hurt (1x)

    Okay … apparently lesbian, abortion and hurt are offensive …

  30. oh and i have written fuck in my lit blog and there has been worse but i guess they just aren’t as thorough as morals police should be.

  31. and i’m still waiting for the full frontal male! ; )

  32. Allie: Hell yes. I hate that. Mentioning that queer people exist is somehow not age-appropriate for young children. Because there’s nothing about being queer but the buttsex.

  33. i looked again, funny “hurt” gets picked, “lesbian” gets picked up but the word “rape” didn’t?

    how bout “incest????”

  34. I got a R also, I WANT NC-17!

    * death (6x)
    * drugs (4x)
    * gay (3x)
    * ass (2x)
    * queers (1x)

    One would think gay ass queers would get ya NC-17!

  35. How arbitrary can they get? My dog’s blog got an “R” rating for: poop (11x) steal (3x) sex (2x) dangerous (1x). Seriously, my DOG?

  36. SAP

    What the fuck?!?!? NC-17!!!

  37. SAP


    You’ll just have to wait until Spudsy comes back. ๐Ÿ™‚

  38. Kym

    I got an R, and I hardly ever write anything meaningful.

    * abortion (4x)
    * rape (2x)
    * bitch (1x)

  39. Wow! I am an R, based on two little words:

    * dyke (10x)
    * ass (1x)

    Lest we were concerned that this “tool” was really trying to protect children, rather than simply another homophobia indicator.

    That chaps my dyke-y ass.

  40. JoAsakura

    bunter: you have a dirty, dirty dog.

  41. I was actually a little disappointed at how few f-bombs there were on my front page. I mean, we got the NC-17 and all, but it feels a little empty, you know? Is there anything beyond their NC-17 rating, I wonder? You know, like, a picture of a movie executive retching in his/her office while security carries the director away? Cuz I totally want that.

  42. i’ll be waiting! you betcha i will! ; )

  43. ROFL with tears in my eyes. I am sooo proud
    gimme an R baby!
    gay (7x) gays (4x) death (3x) missionary (1x)
    what about the fuck bomb I always drop?

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  45. that’s funny as hell, because I put in some stuff from my other blog site that really should have set off all sorts of radar (I have an NC17 rating on my blog as a disclaimer) and it kept coming up General, HA!hahahha

  46. Jeff

    You’ll love this one, Melissa.

    I ran a CNN transcript of Anderson Cooper 360 with an interview of your old pal Bill Donahue of the “Catholic League (of Hatemongers)” through, and it got a….(drumroll, please)


    for the following terms:

    sex (20x)
    death (4x)
    suicide (3x)
    knife (2x)
    dangerous (1x)

    Shame on you, Billie…won’t somebody pleeeeeasssse think of the Children?

  47. I got an NC-17 when I saw this late last night: rape(x3), fuck(x8) and a couple others including death. Faux Noise, btw, got a PG.

  48. I’m still trying to recover from seeing “male full frontal” and “via George” so close together on the internets….

  49. Pingback: Eyes like falling *.*s - My culture is defective.

  50. I got NC-17 because of the following words:

    * abortion (5x)
    * hell (4x)
    * turd (2x)
    * fucking (1x)

    Well, all I can say is, “Fucking hell, you turd abortion of a rating site.”

  51. I did it again, and while I was still rated NC-17, the words and frequency thereof changed. Either somebody ‘broke in’ and altered my posts, or the rating site sucks….

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  53. R rating here.
    death (6x) hell (4x) dead (2x) gun (1x)

    By the way, if you haven’t seen the doc This Film Is Not Yet Rated, check it out. The MPAA has actually announced some changes this year because of it.

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