Question of the Day

How did you meet your significant other?Β  If you’re not currently in a relationship, how did you meet your last partner, or what was the most interesting place you ever met someone who became a significant other, will do.


Filed under 05_mr_shakes

69 responses to “Question of the Day

  1. Standing outside a building with my smoker friends in between classes. It doesn’t sound that interesting, but the classes that my s.o. and I were on our way to were not supposed to be in that building. If they had been in their appropriate spots on campus we probably would never have crossed paths.

  2. Kim and I were in a class together in grad school, and had a somewhat rancorous disagreement about the interpretation of a historical document. We argued about it for about twenty minutes. It wasn’t the best way to start a relationship, you might think, but here we are, inseparable and totally in love fourteen years later.

    Oh, and, um. I was right.

  3. We met online in an old style telnet chat room. πŸ™‚

  4. Mungen_Cakes

    I met Mrs. Cakes because I’m in a band, man. The lead guitar player regularly delivered chicken to the grocery store butcher where she worked so he invited her to see the band, man.

    Being in a band. The best way to meet chicks.

  5. I met my last partner, Sean, when I was dating a friend of his. We both broke up with our boyfriends at the same time and I invited Sean to my birthday party. He brought me a plate of Toll House cookies — having remembered that I mentioned they were my favorite. He ended up spending the night and we were a couple for almost six years. We’re still good friends.

  6. cyrki

    I met him on a blind date to play racquet ball. We continued to play racquetball. Met Nov 2, first “date,” Dec 14, proposed to Feb 14th, married August 14, 25 years ago this August.

  7. SAP

    I met her at a wedding reception. She asked me to dance. She fit justso in my arms.

  8. Betsy

    He was assigned to be my, ahem, “big sibling” when I entered graduate school. πŸ˜‰

  9. I met A.J.P. at the University of Colorado Gay/Lesbian Alliance Spring Dance in April 1984. He was there with two straight friends, and he came up to me and asked me to dance to the Vapors’ “Turning Japanese.” Later we followed each other to a diner, had coffee with his friends, and got his phone number. He came over the next night and brought me flowers. I was smitten. We were together for 15 years and we still keep in touch.

  10. MR. Bill

    My friend and buddy Jack needed a hand trenching in a gas line at ‘this great guy’s” new place he was building. Art was slow, the studio was hot, and I really enjoyed the idea of running a trencher at the spectacular jobsite af 3000 ft.
    But I had a flat on the way up the mountain, and my van’s spare was flat.
    I had walked halfway up when Jack rode up with a wiry, coyboy looking dude with the greenest eyes on the planet.
    Pretty much downhill from there.

  11. Chris and I met in the college theater . . . he helped out with set construction on Picnic; we were both cast in The Mystery of Edwin Drood; and then we were cast as husband and wife in Titanic. πŸ™‚ We started dating soon after that, and now we’ve been married almost two years.

  12. isabelita

    “I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still…” My beloved spouse of 33 years and I met in high school band. He played trumpet, I played clarinet. I thought he was kind of a wise ass, which he was, and remains so to this day. BEST FUCKING THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME.
    Mr. Shakes, what happened to your blog?

  13. Angelos

  14. The GF and I meet on Gotta love the Internets!

  15. Doktor Wankenstein

    Way to go, cyrki!

    Met the Missus twenty-four years ago this past weekend.

    There was a dance club I used to go to Saturdays, she used to go there on Fridays. After a while, I started going there on Thursdays, because the club would raise the age limit to attract an older crowd. One Thursday night, I couldn’t make it, so I decided to go the next night (Friday).

    I wasn’t one of those types that would pester a girl to dance after being turned down, so my usual answer was “OK”, walk away, and find someone else.

    Then I saw her.

    She had long beautiful red hair, and a red and white patterned dress.

    She danced alone, and with great enthusiasm.


    So I walked up, and said (or rather _shouted_, because the music was SO DAMN LOUD)…



    I couldn’t hear her properly, and I had assumed she’d turned me down.

    “OK,” I shouted, and turned to leave.






    Eventually we sorted it out, and danced until closing time. Tiny Tim was a friend of the owner, and we saw him chatting from a distance… we took that as some kind of omen. We spent the rest of the evening talking in the parking lot. Dawn broke as I drove home, fifteen minutes away.

    We’ll be married twenty years come September.

    We still get a chuckle out of that story. πŸ™‚

  16. txrad and I met at a “straight” club in San Diego. I had only been living there a month and was sitting at a table near the dance floor sulking. I saw a figure standing before me and I must have glanced up at him for a split second and then looked down again at my beer or whatever drink I was nursing. He was standing very close to me and I just reached over and hooked my pinky finger around his.

    In the following days we got kind of rowdy (imagine that) — making out and whatnot, and once we were asked by a bouncer in the club to cool it.


  17. I was bluemeanie’s tutor in freshman physics for a while, then we met again at a mutual friend’s party the next year. During tutoring sessions, we spent a majority of the time not talking physics, but our own things. Which was extremely unusual for me personally. πŸ˜‰

  18. First day of college band, I’m a sophomore and she’s a freshman. I’d like to say it was love at first sight, but for me it was a case of her being a hottie, and for her it was a case of me being a huge dork. I did manage to become her friend, which almost doomed the whole thing, what with the “I don’t want to ruin our friendship” and “you’re like a brother” lines.

    I finally gave up and started seeing another girl casually. That got her interested, finally, and honestly I wasn’t scheming – I wasn’t that smart. Let me tell you, you’ve never seen anyone flirt like my wife. It’s been 15 years since we started dating and almost 13 years (next month!) since we got married, and a quick smile or surreptitious brush of her fingertips can still turn me into melted, quivering goo.

  19. Allie

    I was running the campaign to keep an anti-gay marriage off the ballot in Illinois. She came in to volunteer. I went to work on the computer next to hers and sweet talked her into coming back a second time. When she did – I knew that was it.
    Almost a year now – and I’m gonna marry that girl.

  20. Allie

    BTW – Happy Anniversary to the Shakes family.

  21. Less than a week until Icky Thump

    I was watching
    with one eye on the other side
    I had fifteen people telling me to move
    I got moving on my mind
    I found shelter
    In some thoughts turning wheels around
    I said 39 times that I love you
    to the beauty I had found

    Well its 1 2 3 4
    take the elevator
    at the hotel yorba
    I’ll be glad to see you later
    all they got inside is vacancy

    I been thinking
    of a little place down by the lake
    they got a dirty little road leading up to the house
    I wonder how long it will take till we’re alone
    sitting on the front porch of that home
    stomping our feet on the wooden boards
    never gonna worry about locking the door

    And its 4 5 6 7
    grab your umbrella
    grab hold of me
    cause I’m your favorite fella
    all they got inside is vacancy

  22. rxl

    Ryan was a co-worker’s roommate. We moved in together 3 months later and got married a year after that. We got divorced last fall, but are still dating, since we are still in love, still each other’s best friends and are still the smartest person the other knows.

  23. What the fook? Liss, you got Mr. Shakes out doing your dirty work?


  24. I met my dood on the Net!

    1999–Radiohead launched their messageboard. My future husband and I got into a knock down drag out fight about religion and the Christmas holiday. He called me a Nazi. I hated him.

    Fast forward to dec 2001 He was a presence on the board, but I was never inclined to talk to him. I thought he was a big fat jerk! I don’t know how it happened, but we started talking about photography since we were both college student for it. 2002 came and we were always talking. He told me that he was transferring to a college in Denve, Co and would be limited in his internet access. saddened, I was never sure if we would talk again. a few months passed and he posted on the board in the comp lab and I had given him my e mail address. I came home, checked my e mail and he had written me a message that said:
    “of all the people I miss talking to on the board, it’s you I miss the most.” and he left his cell phone number for me to call. I called, left a message and he called me back. We talked for four hours that first night.

    It was common knowlegde that he was in a long term relationship that was quickly going down hill. we’d often talk about his situation and his dreams of moving to California to pursue a full time job in Photography. I knew his relationship was at an end. I also knew I had a massive crush on him.

    Labor Day weekend, 2002. I called him for four days an he didnt answer. I thought, “well, it’s silly to have a crush on someone 1700 miles away.” He finally called and said, “My GF and I are going to get back together and try again” I ended the conversation so quickly that evening. He called me back and asked me if I was he was making the right decision. I asked if he wanted an honest answer. He said yes. I told him he was the stupidest MF on the planet and he would be miserable if he stayed with someone whom he knew he wasn’t happy with. he replied with one phrase, ” I think i’m in love with you”

    On Oct 4, 2002, he flew one way to Baltimore, Md from Colorado. He had no job, no place to live and 150$ in his wallet. We met face to face for the very first time in BWI airport.

    we were married on Oct 30th 2005. It’s never been a happier time. I don’t recommend my method, but damn…you have to go with your gut once.

  25. MrMtyzptlk

    A Sunday afternoon beer bust; Memorial Day, 1998. I only went because I didn’t have to work the next day. I got a lot of eye and gave a lot of eye, but wasn’t impressed so I made my way through the crowd and dropped off my plastic beer cup at the bar and then made eye contact with the bluest baby blues I had ever seen, attached to a sun tanned face with that bushy mustache I like so much. I picked up my drink and motioned the bartender for a refill.

  26. I was going through my sitemeter stats and looking at visitors. Followed a spammer’s trail back to her blog, left a comment, she commented back on my blog and I drove three hours to meet her a couple of weeks later. It’s been over a year and a half and now she’s leaving for grad school in a couple of months. Damn.

  27. somehow my lyric source missed the part about “let’s get married by a priest.”

    I guess kona needs to shop around. I knew it looked funny.

    You can’t trust the fucking internets.

  28. We were in the same third-grade class together.

    Don’t start thinking that creepy pedo thing, though. She was totally intolerable for years until she got rid of the cooties and girl’s germs in high school.

  29. I went to university a week early my freshman year to try to pass the “get out of taking trig again” test by doing their “semester in a week” course, which involved non-stop trigonometry every day from 8 am to 3:30 pm, followed by enough homework to keep you up until midnight or later.

    By Wednesday night we were “math-ed out” so when somebody’s roommate announced that her boyfriend’s frat was throwing a “drink and watch the girls being herded between sorority houses” party with lots of free beer, we all went.

    Hubs and his best friend (who was gorrrrrrrrrrgeous) and a couple of others were strategically placed for both viewing and beverages, and we got to yakkin’. Best friend was frenetic and a bit shallow, but Hubs… We could finish each other’s sentences; we adored the same weird bits of pop culture. He asked me up to his room to listen to his Muppet Show albums. (Seriously. He even wrote about it to All Things Considered about five years ago as a follow-up to a Muppet Show piece, and they read the letter on the air. I’ve got the .wav file somewhere…)

    I played the field for about a month, (hey, guy-to-girl ratio at that school was 4-to-1) but kept running into him between classes. Then I walked up to him at another party that frat threw, grabbed his arm and said, “Get me a beer.”

    And I never let go. It’ll be 27 years this August. We’ve been married 24 years this Christmas.

    I caught a lot of crap from friends my last couple of years at school (after he’d graduated) for getting engaged to “the first guy you dated.” He wasn’t, by a long shot. He was just the best guy I dated. Can I help it that I met him four days before my first semester started?

  30. HolyFatMan, that’s fucking AMAZING! I love that shit!

  31. Gabe

    Early September. College. Junior year. I shared a three bedroom apartment with four other gay men and one lesbian. It was the year of experimentation. The year we set coffee table (rented) on fire…and then the courtyard. So I won’t explain why there was a Tupperware party at our place one night but there was. And there he was, J. Sitting right there on our sofa. I was on my way out the door for a run, skipping the Tupperware party as I was the uptight member of the house at that early point in the year. I could barely said “hi” and was out the door.

    J was very outgoing and everyone really liked him, especially the other guys since (black hair and eyes, an amazing smile…). He was hanging out at our apartment, which was often a bit of a social hub. I knew he was interested in me because he’d told my closest friend but I couldn’t understand why he wasn’t making a move — particularly since I was clearly on the shy side despite my best attempts at flirting. Finally, after weeks of this, we were passing in the hallway to the bedrooms and I just pressed him to the wall, kissed him, and we got lost in it — could have been seconds or it could have been an hour, I don’t know. It would become a hallmark of our relationship, him looking to me to make all the big decisions while he ran daily life and all the little decisions that come in living together.

    We were kids. Just 20. It lasted for seven years. It ended seven years ago. A foolish ending. We’re very close even though we don’t live on the same coast. We IM our days away at work. I see J about once a year. When I first see him, that first moment, it always feels like my chest is just going to float away. We’ll be living in the same city again later this year. Mental health be damned, I entertain the occasional daydream where we’re pressed to a wall and lost again. We’ll see.

  32. christen

    Illustrious and I met on 2 years ago – I was surfing the ‘net while I was dog sitting at my ex’s house, drunk and very depressed. Traded snarky emails for a month or so, talked on the phone, met in person and it was love at first sight…. got my man love on teh internets!!!

  33. PhoenixRising

    OMG Chet, me too.

    We argued for 45 minutes about an obscure historical document which had been assigned to our class as reserve reading. It was the first week of school, so we met for the first time when I handed Mrs. PhoenixRising that folio from behind the Reference Desk, at which I worked.

    20 short months later, we were both single. In the meantime, we had spent 17 calendar days arguing about similarly obscure topics, and one thing led to another…over 13 years ago.

    Also, I was right, in all cases.

  34. PhoenixRising

    Oh, and by ‘one thing led to another’ I mean, ‘and I was too upstanding to touch her until she had not just filed for divorce but completed the settlement conference’. I’m older and wiser now…

  35. We met at work–both grad students. She had a boyfriend, I was brazen, she sent him back to Scotland and took me on a month later. That was nearly seven years ago. I’ve never had anyone affect me the way she does. You can see a recap of our first date here in comic form.

  36. We’re gonna burn the competition out in two weeks.

    You thought you heard a sound?

    It’s coming thru the foam.

  37. C. Diane

    I met my darling on the internets. I went to a role playing club during my year of grad school and met a bunch of interesting people. One of them invited me to a new year’s eve party at his mom’s house in Louisville, and I went. One of the people there invited me to join their mailing list, but I decided to hang in the IRC chat room first, to get to know people better.

    He was already on the list, having gone to college with some of the people on the ML. I joined up, too, and we had a lot of private chats and long-distance phone calls (I was in NY, he was in NC). One day, a friend of his from college decided to … nudge things along. This was about early February at the latest. He flew up over his spring break, we met in person for the first time, and he moved in with me in May. (Although we both moved back to NC, because I’d quit grad school because I was shite and I’d changed my career goal anyway. And he was still in the MS program at UNC.)

    We were engaged in June, and married a year later. Anniversary number 7 is coming up in a week and a half.

  38. pidomon

    Wow what a gerat QOTD
    Have no significant other right now but “teh one I let get away” is a great story
    We went to college together but the only time I met her I was a pledge in the band fraternity and we had to get the signatires of all the people in KKY.
    We went to this one guys dorm room and kept pounding on the door screaming “WE NEED YOUR SIG”. He finally relented and there she was covered only in a hseet laughing her ass off that there were these 12 dweebs outside his door saying ;Yes Sir Your signature Sir”
    Fast forward many years later and she walks into my place of business and we kind of look at each other with that “I know you from somewhere” look.
    We finally figured out it was college.
    A couple months later one of our vendors had a huge party for us and our clients. The guy throwing the party was “Hey she’s into you” and I was all like ” WOW U R so wrong”
    but as the Da Vinlys played I tok a chance and we made a connection.
    While we are not together in “that” way I still coorespond with her and see her when she’s available when I go home to Texas.

    I’ll spare everyone the girl who thank gawd got away when she fell for the line at a payphone when I said “Hey if you’re trying to call me I’m not home.” Funny line and a lot of pain and money later LOL

  39. Mike

    Ah, the sixties. We’ve been married 37 years, having grown up together after meeting, get this, at a “Non-Verbal Communication Encounter Group” in 1968. We touched each other’s faces and eventually other parts for some time, communicating nonverbally, dontchaknow. We were eventually married by the campus chaplain who had run the “encounter”; he shook like an aspen leaf during the ceremony, more nervous than either of us. We both wore green–I a bell-bottomed suit, she a beautiful green gown. It was January, right after a monumental snowstorm that had paralyzed our area. The chaplain, who was also an experimental psychology prof, later wrote the book that popularized the notion of the G-spot, which made him a fortune. I don’t know what became of him, but my nonverbal communicant and I are still together. And words are not sufficient.

  40. KarateMonkey

    RedSonja and I met at an online dating site. (If any of you single folks out there are looking to meet someone I highly recommend spring street networks. They’re the folks behind the personals network for sites like salon and the onion.) Anyway, one of the questions on their profile had to do with either the best or most recent book you’ve read, and she listed one I’d finished, this one if you’re curious. (As another aside, this is a fun series if you’re into pulp Sci-Fi/Fantasy.)

    Our first date was on a Saturday. We went to dinner and had a great time then we went to a movie neither of us was really interested in just to keep the evening going and watched the beginning of it.

    I was actually supposed to go on another first date with a different woman the next night. The only time in my life that ever happened and I fell hard for the first one. My stupid sense of integrity wouldn’t let me be a playa just once. I called the other woman and told her I had to see where this thing I thought was going to be very serious would lead, and until I knew that I’d just be leading her on. Three years later I don’t regret it for an instant.

  41. KarateMonkey

    I should also mention that for an instant I almost didn’t write to RedSonja becuase in the picture she used she was holding, a cute little dog, and thought she seemed a little too…wholeseome. Sweet Jesus was I wrong.

  42. College – I was the VP of the literary magazine, Loki was studying the literary society (a social group of writers) for an athropology project and got completely involved. I loved him instantly – he was so engaging to speak to, and he was genuinely interested in me.

    I stalked him for a while to allow him the opportunity to get to know me and fall in love with me, and damned if that didn’t work for me.

  43. Rachel

    I was in a chatroom with a bunch of my internet buddies, when my friend K’s husband showed up in the chatroom and proceeded to piss me off completely. I decided that she had terrible taste in men and vowed never to deal with him personally.

    A group of internet buddies came over to kidnap me for a party, including K, whom I’d never met in person before. K started telling these dirty haikus that her husband had just made up, right off the top of his head. I laughed so hard that soda came out my nose.

    Six months later, K and her husband C came back to town to visit, and I met him. He did an impersonation of Max from Hart to Hart and I couldn’t stop laughing the rest of the night.

    Six months later, they moved here, and I got C a job at my company. We ended up getting along remarkably well and became pretty good friends.

    Six months later, they got divorced, and K convinced me to take C in as my roommate– by telling me that she was letting him take the couch. I really loved that couch.

    Six months later, we went off the deep end from sheer sexual tension and started making out while watching Raiders of the Lost Ark.

    A year later, we were engaged. I was the maid of honor in K’s wedding to her current husband, and C gave her away.

    A year later, we were married. K was one of the groomsmaids, and her mother was the flower girl.

    Seriously, if I hadn’t lived it, I wouldn’t believe this shit.

  44. Andy says he was a mail-order bride that I got by mistake, yet decided to try to make things work with.

    The real story is that we met on a LiveJournal community for complaining about customers. He had stories from working at movie theatres, I had stories about working at Tim Horton’s. We came across each others’ posts, checked out each others’ userinfo, found each other interesting, etc. etc. Eventually I caved and got AIM so I could have somewhat proper conversations with him (instead of pages of LJ comments; silly Americans apparently hardly use MSN) and we hit it off. I admit that one of the first things about him that made me grin was that he liked the Weakerthans – hell, I was happy he knew who they were since a lot of Canadians are unaware of their awesomeness. In any case, we became pretty good friends. That was two years ago.

    A year later, we’re in that whole “hey I kinda like you and I’ve admitted it but I’m not going to do anything about it because we live hours away from each other” phase. He was supposed to come visit but his identification was stolen so he couldn’t cross the border (beginning a long saga that I explain, in part, in my blog). We finally met just after Canadian Thanksgiving of that year, after he got sick and wound up in the hospital and I went to visit him (alone, very stupid of me), which ended up being the day he was released, but alas. Everything was just as awesome in person as it had been before. We made that our ‘anniversary’ and have pretty much fallen madly in love. πŸ˜€

  45. kellgo

    The winter we met we went on cross country ski trips and traveled way further than our other friends. After a while we quit taking the other friends.

  46. mamajane

    Twenty-four years ago, in the back of my big sister’s pick-up truck. We were both freshmen, both of our older sisters were seniors. They let us hitch a ride home from school with them, but only “bulldogging it” in the back. He was this adorable redheaded, sweet faced boy, and I was smitten. Problem, I was dating Michael, who is to this day one of my best friends, and he was dating someone else as well. We had lots of mutual friends, but not much contact throughout the next four years. He dated one of my best friends, Dianne, for a short time junior year. Two years later, during my xmas break from college, Richard, who was stationed in Virginia at the time, was also visiting home . We got together with a group of mutual friends, and I was again smitten. He had a huge crush on my best friend, and could care less. Cut to six months later, same old group of friends is trying to stage an intervention for Dianne, who had developed a heroin addiction. I called Richard to ask for his help, and we wound up talking on the phone for hours. He came home to help with the intervention, and we went on our first date. The intervention didn’t work, but the date did. Almost nineteen years, eleven years of marriage, two kids, three dogs, and a home later, things are still working rather well!

  47. puellasolis

    At a conference. A physics conference. No joke. At the end of my first year in grad school. He had just started working for a lab where I was a summer intern in college. At this meeting we had mutual colleagues and ended up hanging out a fair bit. That was two years ago, and now we’re about to move in together. He’s an experimentalist who’s a total geek (video games & comic books) and I’m a theorist who’s into food, wine, opera, etc. There is lots of good-natured ribbing. Yay nerd love!

  48. Arkades

    I’m a bearish guy who likes other bearish guys, so already I’m working with a restricted dating pool (being a subculture of a subculture and all that). Top that off with being a major nerd into computers, fantasy, scifi, superheroes, gaming, and the like… I began to despair of finding someone witty, attractive, kind-hearted, with similar interests.

    Fortunately, the ‘Net works wonders every now and then. I met a nice, handsome guy via an email mailing list community for one of our shared hobbies. We exchanged a couple of messages, but since we lived thousands of miles apart at the time, we didn’t think seriously anything would come of it.

    A few months later, I ran across the same handsome-but-faraway fellow on a completely different mailing list, indicating that we had at least two hobbies in common. I struck up a conversation, which was cordial, but again, we despaired of the difference.

    A month or so after that, we made contact on yet a third mailing list, and we began to wonder if this was more than mere coincidence. We began to exchange more detailed emails now, and then graduated to instant messaging and then phone calls. Very, very gradually, we became more and more enamored of one another, such that fondness grew into something deeper. It took a while for both of us to realize how much we were made for each other. Once we did, the distance didn’t seem to matter so much.

    Eventually we made the decision we should meet in person. He flew to visit me, and we spent two weeks together. That went well enough that he decided it was worth uprooting his whole life and relocating to be with me. Less than five months after our in-person visit, and roughly three years after our first tentative email contact, he moved in with me. We’ve been together ever since.

  49. That’s a bit of a long story. I worked with my partner’s best friend at Target and eventually got invited to a party at which he was present. Our group of friends hung out regularly, and once he got his own place, we began spending the night off and on, too lazy to go home.

    Eventually these spending-the-nights moved from the living room and into his bedroom, and then from his bedroom floor into his bed. It began as strictly platonic but, well, soon became not-platonic.

    A few months after that, and I had a set of clothes and toiletries that I kept over there, and I had a key to the apartment. A few months after that, we moved in together, and now one year later … here we are, surfing the internets together and him chastising me to get back to studying for finals.

    Ahh, love. πŸ™‚

  50. BlueUU

    We both worked at the dining hall freshman year. I was on dessert detail, putting out plates of cake, and as I turned around with a couple plates in my hand, I saw him swinging one of those big milk refills into the dispenser. I thought, sweet lord, who IS that? A few days later I saw him again and asked a coworker his name; she said “That’s Dan. He’s the student manager. Wanna meet him?” That hadn’t actually occurred to me–hey, I was 18 and dense about such things. But later when we were eating after our shift she did invite him over to say hi and we talked awhile. I thought he was amazingly sweet, and I couldn’t believe how warm and fuzzy I felt just chit-chatting with him, but I had a boyfriend.

    Fast forward a year, we were living on the same dorm floor, and gradually got to know each other. We were hot for each other, but I was still dating the same other guy. So Dan and I flirted, tried to be friends, drove each other nuts with sexual tension. Eventually he gave up and started dating someone else. My boyfriend and I broke up around that time, and I started dating someone else–and ended up marrying him.

    As time went by we maintained a long distance relationship, Ohio to Iowa, talking on the phone and emailing once that came into being. I had some kids, my marriage went south, I felt guilty divorcing the father of my children. Dan grew to be my best friend, supportive through all of this even though he was in love with me. Gradually I was realizing that I felt the same way. Finally he got fed up and went to live in Japan for a few years. He got married while he was over there, just as I was getting divorced. His marriage was even more torturous than mine and lasted less than 2 years. A week after she left, he called me from California, I flew out to see him. One more trip out there later that summer and we decided he’d move here and go to grad school.

    So to recap: we met in 1981-82, decided to commit to giving it a try in 2001, and were married in 2005. We could not be happier, finally. The only bad thing is that we both regret how long it took, how much time we missed out on when we could have just been happily together. But we definitely don’t take it for granted!

    Happy Anniversary to the Shakeses, and to all the rest of the happily partnered, celebrate!

  51. RayCeeYa

    Met her at a punk rock show.

    Thought I liked her.

    Asked her if I could pour beer over her head.

    Dated her for 2 years.

  52. Sha Na Na

    I met my partner when her clueless girlfriend invited me along on their 4th date. I didn’t know it was supposed to be a date for them and when I arrived she was baffled and pissed off that someone had come along on their date.

    Later we both broke up with our GFs, and a different mutual friend set us up. That was 15 years and 2 kids ago.

    Whew! That was the best somebody else’s date I ever went on.

  53. We met through a Leather/Fetish/BDSM group. I was thin and waifish and looked oh-so-young. (Yes, those are manga behind me.) and she totally fell for that despite a lifelong fondness for butches. It took me a few months to figure it out. That was in 2001, and we were married 14 May 2005. I surprised both of us by wanting a really girly traditional kind of wedding. I mean really. I wanted pearl pink and ivory for the colors, and I managed to get it, too. It was awesome; all these wonderfully sexy butch Leathermen wearing pink just because I asked them to. I had like two bites of cake and a bottle and a half of champagne that day. XD

  54. Brynn

    Your amazing stories have so warmed my heart!!! Here I am at work, surrounded by bankers busily banking away, and I’m lost in another world, a tiny smile on my lips, as I read of wonderful people finding one another!

    Oh, and the happiest of happy anniversaries to Mr & Mrs Shakes!!!

  55. Polonius19

    I was a field service tech for a company that did the auto emissions testing for Maricopa County (Phoenix). We were rotated 6 months on day shift and 6 months on night and I was scheduled to work nights from July through December. Karla was hired by one of the stations that I serviced in late June of that year. I was smitten when I saw her, but lacked the confidence to approach her.

    My night shift duties were to calibrate the gas analyzers of each station monthly. When I’d visit the Karla’s station, I would check the posted roster in the manager’s office to see if she still worked for the company.

    As January approached I resolved to ask her out and managed to find the courage to do just that. We started dating that month and by June we were married. We’ve been together ten blissful years and have three fantastic kids and we couldn’t be happier.

  56. magikmama

    Wrong number.

    Seriously – my number was one digit off of his ex-girlfriends. He was about to call her up and get back together, but I was in a random mood that night, and instead of just saying, “wrong number,” I was like, this ain’t her, but boy howdy do you have a sexy voice. And he was all like, um, thanks, what’s your name? And then we talked for about 8 hours because it turned out that we were both sci-fi freaks, it was the midnight before halloween, and I knew 30 minutes in that we were meant to be together.

    We met that night, and when he showed up wearing a kilt in a way that said, “I be scottish” vs “I am cultural appropriating this – look, boy in a skirt!!!”, I knew it was destiny.

    We moved in together 2 weeks later, and were married before new years.

    We are about to celebrate our 6th anniversary.

  57. Mr. M and I met in a pub 16 years ago. What I thought was going to be a one night stand turned into the love of my life.

  58. Sadly it didn’t work out, but the most recent ex and I met at USI. We hang out in the same place with the same people, so there was bound to be overlap. Actually, he annoyed the hell out of me for a long time. The worst was when he STOLE MY SHOES in Econ class and he didn’t get in trouble, but I did for trying to get them back.

    Obviously I got over it, ’cause we started talking one day, just kept talking for a few weeks, he talked me into going to Anime Central 2005, and that’s where we got together. Surrounded by 25,000 crazy-dressed anime geeks. It was lovely.

  59. L

    I met her through and we’ve been together over four years now. She’s my everything.

  60. DBK

    Dating service. Don’t tell anyone. We don’t generally let that out. We always say we met via an “introduction” by a mutual acquaintance who thought we might like one another, which is technically true.


  61. I met him my freshman year in college–he was a friend of a friend. The day after we all finished exams, I and 4 other friends were at our mutual friend’s dorm room hanging out late at night. He lived in the same dorm and stopped by, and hung out with us for a few hours. Sadly, while I remember meeting him, he doesn’t remember meeting me that night at all–instead, he remembers meeting my crazy friend, who, it’s true, was probably more memorable. Later we lived in the same dorm and he roomed with one of my best friends–then our senior year we had a suite with two other people (I’m a woman, but they allowed us to have a co-ed group because there were two bathrooms in our suite) and finally started dating. It took a while, but we’ve been together for six years since then.

  62. The first time I met Rua, it was after a cross country drive to Colorado. My friend S and I met him a bar – Rua and she were close friends.

    I do not remember meeting him then. I vaguely remember meeting someone in a dark-paneled bar, but I was blurry with fatigue, homesickness, and stress.

    In the ensuing months in CO, he and I became good friends. He had a crush on me and wanted to ask me out, but never worked up the nerve. I wasn’t attracted to him at all.

    I left CO, we lost contact for 5 years.

    2003 – S gets married. Both Rua and I are in the wedding. I saw him come into the tent at the rehearsal dinner and … something went straight through me. We talked and hung out all through the wedding and into the wee hours of the morning afterwards. And from there? We were together. We saw each other when we could, then he moved to OH 6 months later.

    What a great question – I love seeing how pairs come together.

  63. I met my hubby through the dead tree personals. I had to keep renewing my ad every two weeks, and once when I called, I asked the ad-taker if they could just run it until I called to cancel. She said no, aren’t you getting any dates? I said, sure I am, but I’m looking for a husband, and he’s gotta be one in a thousand, so I need to be prepared to meet a thousand men. she laughed.

    My ad ran out one week cause I forgot to call, so I called one myself. Met him just before Valentines day, and what a great kisser! It took 3 long years to get to where I moved in, and another year being engaged before I married him. (I was waiting for the heat to burn off, but it never did)

    We just celebrated 7 years of bliss on June 10.

  64. lizvelrene

    Comic book store. He was about 53rd in the line of guys to hit on me in a comic book store over the years, and the only one I ever said “yes” to. I shop in a total headphone fog and didn’t notice him at all, but he noticed me for weeks before approaching. He was tall, dark, and handsome, and nervously respectful, and I was utterly charmed. We went straight to the coffee house next door and talked for hours. We bonded over Alan Moore, Warren Ellis, Luc Besson movies, anime, and indie rock. Total geek love. That was about 4 years ago. We’re moving in together next month.

  65. I met my last partner via the Internet, and it turned out that he was a master liar and manipulator and I booted his ass to the curb this last October. I have kinda given up lately, because I have firmly come to believe that my soul mate was kidnapped by aliens and is now living in a petting zoo on the planet Xanthrope.

  66. I met my significant other the same way you met yours. πŸ™‚ One of the reasons I love reading about your and Melissa’s adventures so much is that they remind me of me and Robin, although we’re about a half generation older than you and his accent is British rather than Scottish.

  67. Reba

    Outside a Renaissance Faire where I was working. Years of observation taught me that men don’t go to shows in costume alone. Definitely not wearing a kilt. They’re in groups or they’re with women or even with groups of women. So I felt that he was a good mark for flirting. In ten years of performing, I had never misread anyone that badly. For one thing, turns out he was a veteran of another faire. For another, he actually was alone, having been blown off by a prospective girlfriend (thank you whomever you are!).

    He asked me out three times that weekend, and I turned him down three times, because it was my rule to never date the audience. Then he gave me his address and phone number and said he was going into the military. We had a letter courtship, during which I tried diligently to convince him that dating me might not be a great idea. We spent a lot of money on long distance charges. Dogged persistence and an amazing sense of humor won out and I finally let him visit. Okay, so his beautiful eyes had something to do with that decision. He asked me to marry him on our first date. The next day, I said yes. Fifteen years later, I’m still glad.

  68. He emailed me through MySpace and when I seemed a little patient about when we should meet up, he wrote an incredibly charming one-page play where he showed off his writing skills and flattered my writing abilities shamelessly. Beers were had at a local pub where the local Drinking Liberally meets, no less.

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